The Age of Carrie

I need to start by saying that I was not looking forward to my birthday. At 32 I think you've lived long enough now to actually look back and truly digest certain moments, experiences and lessons your life. I can see the landmarks, the bumps, the scrapes, the wounds that still pulse ever so slightly at times and the scars that mark strength and bravery.

Yes I am old. It's not the old of twenty five when you say you're old, you feel but you're not really old. At 32 you feel old and are old. I wouldn't say it's depressing or anything. It's just a fact.

I've always secretly wanted to be famous. Who doesn't crave a certain need for attention? That secret longing for acknowledgment and recognition from adoring strangers. Living in New York was tough because America is so youth-obsessed. It's so easy to feel like a failure when compared to a Rihanna, a Pharell, a Mark Ronson, a MisShapes, a Heatherette, a Zac Posen, A Natalie Portman....

When Sex and The City began, Sarah Jessica Parker (Carrie) was 32. For almost ten years a loyal fan base has followed every move Carrie and her friends have made. At 32 I know I'm still a work in progress and I am totally grateful for that. Goals become more nuanced, subtle. Maybe fame is not as important as happiness? My desire to "run away" aka "I really want to travel!" has been slowly replaced by a tiny wish to grow some roots somewhere. I feel more in my skin than ever, more aware of the kinks, the exhaustion but also the elation and the wonder...

I feel like I'm getting better at just sifting through the bullshit, taking what I need, laughing when I can and enjoying my friends more. Happiness is definitely more of a consistent state and not a fleeting one. Not bad as I enter the Age of Carrie...

CANCER: Part One and Two

Rob Brezsny (Astrologer extraordinaire):

Part One: How well are you capitalizing on this year's unique opportunities, Cancerian? Now that we're halfway through 2008, let's take inventory. I'm hoping that six months from now, you'll look back and make the following declaration: "This year I discovered
everything that's important for me to know about what I don't need and who I don't want to be. That's one of the important reasons why - hallelujah! - I've learned to avoid the suffering that comes from wishing my life were different from how it actually is. I'm more at peace with my soul's idiosyncratic destiny than I've ever been."

Part Two: Welcome to Part Two of your outlook for the second half of 2008, Cancerian. We're checking up on how well you're progressing with the challenges you were given near the end of last year. Here's one of the most important things I hope you're doing: getting clear about which influences in your life encourage you toward mediocrity, and which influences, on the other hand, nudge you in the direction of mastery. There's a second crucial lesson that's related to the first: getting clear about which people have low expectations and distorted images of you, and which people, on the other hand, want the best for you and see you for who you really are.

Piknic Electronik

There are just some afternoons that seem to come together almost effortlessly. You exit a metro onto a beautiful park and you follow the pretty people that are heading towards the sounds of techno beats amongst the rustling trees and giggling kids playing in manmade waterfalls. You buy yourself a vodka tonic and wait for your friend Kendra to show up on her bike. And when she does you get more drinks and lay out by the water's edge and flip through the new issue of Nylon Guys and pick out which overpriced polo tee you like the most (um Marc Jacobs: $1, 430 for a fucking pink polo?!) You dance. You laugh. You marvel at all the pretty boys and girls and families and kids and crack-heads and hippy ravers there are. You watch a looming grey cloud overhead and think it might rain but it doesn't. You imagine the cloud as a disguise for a giant UFO trying to hover across the party people below, undetected. It's a thought that makes you laugh a little. The people around you are drinking, eating crackers, dancing, rolling joints. You watch the sunset. You're picking the right moment to leave and almost instantly the DJ plays the most amzing, warped version of Madonna's "Express Yourself". You dance like a madman and mouth all the words. And then you leave, feeling ten years younger. And you wonder why everyday can't be this breezy...

Tam-Tam

Parc Mont Royal

How do I explain this. Tam Tam happens every Sunday in the summer at Parc Mont Royal. It's basically a drumming circle that takes place underneath this giant monument at the edge of the Parc. It's one of those classic ways to spend your Sundays if you're a Montrealer. It's a great way to see the cross section of people in Montreal and see what a pot pourri exists here. The sense of Style here is so distinct because it's just a mix of everything. It's not always a polished look or the most put together but it's self expressed and creative. A guy in a cowboy hat might have his shirt off but wearing army boots, tribal tats and a belt made of hemp holding up his Energie jeans. A girl will wear a tie-dye baboushka but with a metal studded collar around her neck. It's all very haphazard, bohemian and playful.



And rockers and hippies a like will all bring their drums and drum the afternoon away. And this has been going on every Sunday for as long as I can remember. People bring blankets, smoke up, drink beer, cook barbecues, bring their kids, their dogs, their cats. It's just a wonderful sight to see people spending their Sunday afternoon in the park. I know there are many parks in New York City as well. But there's something special about Montreal that I still can't quite put my finger on. It's like there's just no ulterior motive about the social community here. In New York there is almost a sense that you have to be at this or that event. You need to be scene here or watch this show or connect with these people. In Montreal it just feels like a city hanging out for the sake of hanging out. It's the good life.



But this has got to take the cake. This past Sunday I went to meet up with some friends and when I got there I gave them a call. "Yeah, we're by the sand-pit where all the medieval sword fighting is. Do you know where that is?" Um...the WHA?!

Tam Tam happens in Parc Mont Royal. And just within the trees happens the craziest shit. People are juggling, or have tied tight rope between huge trunks to practice low level tight rope walking (I'm not kidding.) But the best is the LARPS. They are Live Action Role Players who dress up and sword fight each other. There are eight year old kids with their crew fighting and there are forty-five year old men in full chain-male and pointy beards ready to do battle in Middle Earth. No doubt the LARPS take this game/sport very seriously and adhere to rules and specific combat moves. Just when you think Montreal can't get any weirder and beautiful it does. I cannot wait until the Summer official begins. Montreal is full of suprises.

Montreal...

...this is the life.

I got cut from work ealyl the other day. It was slow and to be honest I didn't mind. I took the opportunity to hang out on my sister's roof, roll out my yoga mat and do some sun salutations. Afterwards I lit some incense and worked on my tan. Not bad for Thursday. This is the view from her roof.

Went to see Miss Honey Dijon at Stereo last weekend. I was still pretty tired from the week before but I had bought my ticket in advance so I felt compelled to go. Plus I really love Honey Dijon and the last time she was playing here there was a blizzard and there was no way that I was going to go out that night. What can I say? She didn't disappoint but I was expecting more. Maybe it was because I was already exhausted from having a few drinks at Blue Dog beforehand, but I was pretty much ready for bed by the time I arrived at around three. Stereo wasn't packed which surprised me since it was full for Deadmau5 the friday past. Honey played a solid set, everything I expect from a DJ of her calibre. It's pretty classic underground Progressive House: A little sexy with some familiar vocals, hard at times with a bit of tribal thrown in. Gay but not "Circuit". It truly is a fine line and her sound is a crossover sound so it appeals to both a gay and straight crowd which is great.She started with "Work" and through in a Rihanna vocal through some tracks which was cool. I'm glad she played Robyn S. "Show Me Love" though I probably should have just left after that track. Perhaps if the place was crowded I would've enjoyed myself more. The people who were there were great though so I do appreciate all the crazy, fun dancing I was witness to. But I think I prefer Honey in a bit of a smaller venue like Cherry or Tribe Hyperclub. I think a big space like Stereo can support her sound but a smaller venue would give it more impact. I kept hoping she was going to play "Flash" but she didn't. As always, she was fun to watch, diva-licious, but Stereo has its DJ booth at a distance and elevated so it's hard to really feel connected at times. Still, I would definitely go out and see her again.